Yay, you're married! Congratulations! All the wedding things are packed up, you've returned from your honeymoon and now you're staring down the re-entry back to “normal” life … but it's different now.
Photography: Ed & Aileen Photography
You no longer have a wedding to plan. It's very likely that wedding planning has been a large part of your life since you got engaged — and for many that's at least a year. Having wedding-related to-dos is — er, was — part of your normal life. You bid adieu to ticking off the “single” box on official forms, you planned and executed an amazing celebration, then gallivanted off to somewhere gorgeous to spend time with your new spouse and nothing is going to be quite the same as it was. So how do you return to your everyday life knowing that something is different?
Well, darling, very carefully. The transition can be a little rough — and dare I say? — disappointing if you don't take the time to ease into it. You will get flooded with congratulations, salutations and oh, so very many questions about starting a family / buying a home / whose family you'll be spending the holidays with. And the post-wedding blues will start to sink in (sorry, that is, indeed, a thing). But there are ways to make the transition a little easier on you and your spouse, and enjoy that blissful glow just a titch longer.
1. Have a Buffer Day (or Two)
Whether you're going directly on your honeymoon or you're taking a little mini-moon jaunt, tack on an extra day or two after your return to settle back into life as you know it. Take an out-of-office day that allows you to catch up on emails, prepare your schedule and complete any post-wedding tasks (trips to the DMV or returning rentals are usually at the top of this list). You and your spouse will be back in familiar territory but not full-on back to the grind, which helps make the transition a bit less overwhelming.
2. Don't Stop Celebrating
No, I'm not saying go out and get schnockered every night, shoving your wedding band in unsuspecting onlooker's faces and screaming “I'm maaaarrrriiieeeeeeedddd!!!!” But do feel free to keep on keeping bubbly in your fridge (Pro tip: While wedding planning, always keep a bottle of bubbly in your fridge for good days and bad days alike. It's like magic fuel.) and pop one of those bottles to celebrate little milestones, like your two-week anniversary or getting all the thank-you cards sent.
3. Be Gracious
Speaking of thank-you cards, don't procrastinate. The reason being is twofold: 1.) It's the right thing to do in regard to your guest / gifter, and 2.) It will make you feel good for not only being a nice person, but also to really take a moment to appreciate what you were given. A heartfelt thank-you isn't difficult, but it can be daunting. Divide and conquer between yourself and your partner and it'll get done that much more quickly.
4. Set a Routine
Whether you had one before the wedding or not, diving back into your normal everyday without an action plan in place can be overwhelming and difficult. Prepare your coffee the night before and either set the timer or make it so you only have to push a button to get your java and make your mornings a little easier. Set a meal plan or schedule. Discuss errands that need to be run, bills that need to be paid and chores that need to be completed so you and your spouse are on the same page and there is no lingering confusion.
5. Make Time
Likely, you'll return to work and have a few things to catch up on. And your friends will want to go out for happy hour to hear all about your honeymoon and gush over the wedding. And your mom will want to know how she can help decorate your new home. And … and … and … Well, it can be easy to take your new marriage for granted. But make time for one another — plan date nights or Sunday brunches that are just for the two of you. Looking forward to something pre-planned every week helps the newness linger just a little longer, and creates a safety bubble for your relationship.
6. Ogle Your Photos
Let's be real — you spent a pretty penny on your wedding and the one true lasting remnant from the day will be your photos (and video, possibly). It can be easy to initially approach them with a critical eye, but go through them a few times and look beyond yourself. Check out the smile on your buddy Brad's face during your first dance as newlyweds. Laugh over Aunt Mildred's oh-so dated dance skills. Fall in love all over again when you see how happy everyone was to celebrate with you and your partner. Put it up on Instagram. You're married now!
7. Don't Forget the Little Things
Remember all those cute moments early in your relationship? The mid-day text check-in, a surprise purchase from the flea market because it was just too perfect not to, impromptu lunch dates, etc. Just because you're married now doesn't mean that you can just gloss over the small gestures that helped you fall in love in the first place. Continue making one another feel loved and a by carrying on these early traditions.
*Guest Editor's Note: Darlings, I've thoroughly enjoyed my time here at Love, Inc. Brittny, the founder and EIC will be returning next week with her usual amazingness (having just returned from her honeymoon). Remember, if you're planning a badass budget wedding, come see me at The Broke-Ass Bride. xoxo!
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