While weddings are a day dedicated to celebrating love, the rituals and traditions surrounding matrimony are often outdated and don’t represent all love — especially for LGBTQ couples. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t steps you can take to update your wedding to be more mindful and inclusive.
Whether you’re an LGBTQ soonlywed who wants to ensure your wedding day reflects your relationship or you want to create an inclusive atmosphere for your guests who are part of the LGBTQ community, here are four ways you can make your wedding more inclusive.
Use Gender Neutral Wording
You don’t often realize just how gendered elements of a wedding can be until you really take a closer look. When it comes to things like the ceremony, traditional scripts are often riddled with gendered language, specifically tailored to a man and wife. So instead of using an outdated script, commit to one with gender-neutral wording that represents all forms of love. You’ll also want to pay close attention to the wording on items such as invitations, place cards and any personalized items like wedding favors and be sure you consider your guests’ pronouns and titles when addressing envelopes. Finally, you can adopt terms like wedding party or wedding suite instead of bridal party and bridal suite, a phrase that is more appropriate considering many couples have mixed gender wedding parties these days.
Pledge to use only EQUALITY-MINDED™ vendors
Wedding vendors are the unsung, behind-the-scenes heroes that work incredibly hard to pull off an unforgettable fête, and without their dedication, all the little details that make a wedding day special would cease to exist. By pledging to use only EQUALITY-MINDED™ vendors who are open to working with all couples, it will foster change and lead to a more inclusive mindset in the industry. If you’re looking for vendors for your big day, check out The Love List, our curated list of EQUALITY-MINDED™ wedding pros, and rest assured that you have people in your corner who support your love or will show your guests the utmost respect on your wedding day.
Discard gender-specific traditions
Gendered rituals and traditions are ubiquitous in the wedding world, many of which are sexist in nature. From post-ceremony traditions such as the bouquet and garter tosses to the father-daughter and mother-son dances, it’s time these traditions got a more inclusive, modern update. Many couples have opted to exclude outdated, gender-specific traditions altogether, but if you still want to include them in your celebration, consider opening up the garter toss or bouquet toss to all who want to participate, not just the single guys or gals.
Make updates to pre-wedding festivities
Before the big day officially arrives, there are plenty of wedding-related activities that are in need of a modern revision. Every soonlywed deserves to be showered before their wedding, not just a bride, so we love the idea of a couple’s shower where everyone can be involved in celebrating your upcoming nuptials. Further, extend this idea to any bachelorette and bachelor party festivities by adopting the term bach party, and you won’t have to feel like you can only invite your friends whose gender aligns with yours.